Karan-a-go-go

Dear Kids,

Though words cannot adequately express how much I love you, there are a few things I wanted you to know as you develop into the fine young people I expect you will become.  Hopefully, you will remember these words and keep them in your heart long after I’m gone:

1. When you ignore my repeated exhortations to “GET UP and GET DRESSED” for 20-30 minutes and refuse to participate in any apparel or meal planning, chances are you’re going to be late for school.  When this happens, it’s dangerous for you to say things like, “Jeez, mom!  Why do I always have to wait for you to get ready?” or, “Why are you always the LAST one out the door?”
2. The night before an assignment is due is not the best time for you to introduce that assignment to your parent.  (Relatedly: This is not the best time to present a list of demands that includes items as varied as: Styrofoam balls, Peeps, corn starch, and “solar panels”.)
3. While we’re on the subject of random building materials, please understand that requiring you to find a reasonable space to contain your collection of empty toilet paper rolls, egg cartons and two-liter bottles is not an attempt by me to “quash your creativity”.
4. Calling me a “big jerk” is not (and will never be) the way to ensure that you’ll have a piñata at your birthday party.  Or, really, that you’ll even have a birthday party at your birthday party, if you know what I mean.  (It will, however, ensure that I call my best friend to ask, “What do you think she meant by ‘big’?”)
5. While I totally get how funny any kind of scatological reference is to you, I don’t think your near-constant use of the phrase “take a duke” is appropriate. (Although, kudos for using a phrase more original and hip than the traditional “take a dump”.  I can appreciate that you are, perhaps, something of a wordsmith.)
6. And, lastly, when plans change or a “maybe” solidifies into a “no”, I have not lied to you.  I have lied to many, many people over the years and have probably lied to you in ways that will leave you embittered as an adult (I mean, the odds are against you becoming a rock star/movie star/US President, no matter how hard you work in school).  Because I know when and how to prevaricate, I don’t need to waste my time “lying” to you about whether or not you can have your friend ride the bus home with you; maybe you will, maybe you won’t. 

I hope these little tidbits (and their larger implications) will help us navigate the choppy waters of pre-adolescence.  At the very least, heeding these words will prevent you from losing time on your beloved DSi.

With all my love,
Mom

 
Julie Brown- “Cause I’m a Blond”

Mark | MySpace Video

I know, I know… the votes were overwhelmingly (well, there were only six of them) in favor of the light brown/blonde highlights.  But, I forgot to say that mens’ votes counted double.  (Gross, right?)  AND, my stylist advised against brown for summer. 

So… YAY!! I’m a blonde… b-l-o-n-d!

Okay, today is a landmark occasion for me.  For six long months, I’ve been half-assing my hair color with boxes of L’Oreal Les Blondissimes.  The color I’ve been using is the lightest, ashiest blonde you can buy (sans bleach, that is) but it’s been turning my hair more of a golden (read: orange-y) blonde.  Also, I’ve only been doing my new growth at the root and I’ve achieved a bit of a horizontal striped effect down the length of my hair.  Definitely not good.  (But, much, MUCH cheaper.)

So today, I’m going back to my old ways… spending too much money to buy way better hair.  The problem is: I don’t know for sure what I want to do.  And that’s where you come in (if there’s anyone out there).  I need YOUR help to decide which color I want to spend my summer in.  The choices are: dark brown; light brown; light brown w/ blonde highlights; dark blonde; or medium blonde w/ ultra light highlights.  Below are pictures to help you decide which way to vote.

This is pretty light blonde, although I’ve been blonder. I would go paler, less brassy than this.

Ew.  I hate this picture.  I’d been crying for most of the cab ride to the restaurant (long story) and all my make-up was gone.  Nevertheless, I would call this light brown/dark blonde.  It was easy to keep up.  But maybe not my fave. (Although, that could be because of the picture/memory.)

I liked this color a lot (except there is still some issue there near the roots, ugh).  It was easy to take care of and made me feel a little like I was trying to “go natural”.  (Which has never been a big priority for me; I’m fine with fake color.  Also: fake lashes, fake nails, fake breasts, fake whatever; I don’t judge.)  This might be my fave right now, but it’s hard for me to give up on blonde.

This is kind of reddish brown w/ highlights.  I’m mostly just throwing this out as an option; I don’t know if I love it.

And here’s the last choice, which I can tell you won’t be able to see without a magnifying glass.  It’s one of the only pics I have of me with dark hair.  (And also with a dark tan, right?) I actually really liked having dark hair.  Sometimes, I just feel more Veronica than Betty, you know?

Alright, so that’s it then.  If you could cast your vote in the comment section (making sure to throw in any and all unsolicited hair advice, as well), I’d appreciate it.  I know you’re busy, but this is really, really IMPORTANT!

I started to write a post about my divorce and what it’s like to “start over” at 39.  I started to write about the pressure on young women to be thin and pretty, and then,  about what happens when those same women become middle-aged and realize that ‘thin’ and ‘pretty’ are time-sensitive.  I started to write about how I’ve become estranged from my father and how I’m not sure really how it happened or where to go from here.  I started to write… and I got stuck.

So, I think I’m going to show you things, instead. Fun and happy things. Like this little beauty that I’m picking up after work today:

Jealous?  You will be, especially after I affix some sort of Dorothy Gale-esque wicker basket to the front of it and tool around town in my pedal pushers and Keds.  (Or, skirt and low-top Chucks?  Hard call…)

Or, how about this:

He’s the little guy that the kids and I are (possibly) bringing home soon.  (And by possibly, I mean probably.) I know, I know… I’ve heard it all before. Puppies are hard work.  Getting one is like having a new baby in the house.  They’ll chew your shoes and eat you out of house and home.  Ah, well… sometimes kids (and their moms) just need puppies.

And, sometimes, they need kitties, too.  Like this one:

The one the kids and I adopted just last weekend.  He’s something of a charmer in the way that one might find William Kennedy Smith or Ben Rothlisberger charming.  He knows precious little about boundaries or personal space.  But we like him. 

And, the final fun thing I want to share with you is this:

This is my friend, Vas, who won a whopping $180 on Super Saver in the 136th running of the Kentucky Derby.  I love the Derby and I love my friends.  Here’s hoping fortune smiles upon her Preakness and Belmont picks!

I think that’s all I’ve got right now; sorry that it’s a bit pedestrian.  But, I’m super happy that I didn’t go all dark and twisty on you.  I mean, a sad girl could never ride a bike that pink, right?